What would I like to expereince

Easy to sit and write a wish list on things you would like to do or have done to you . Well not for me. Sometimes I lay awake at night with some great fantasy as must we all at some time but with out the ability to fulfill any part of it. Yes I know fantasies seldom come true as reality does not allow the easy transfer from our minds to actual like. So I never try to map out things exactly as was in my fantasy. I try to go for a similar feeling rather than the actual physical act. Very hard to hang by your testicles but hanging something from them is a different story.

So I wanted to take note of things sorry of feelings that I want to still experience. I have not blog in a while due to health issues and questioning the validity of being in the lifestyle. Meaning I have had a lot of time to think about things. First things I have discovered.

My life will never allow me to be totally owned as a slave too many outside forces at work to do that. I have also discovered that while my wife and I do not share the same sexuality at least the same level of it nor the same view of the lifestyle there are many things I do love about my wife. So this is a complication by itself I cannot give over my body totally to another. Even with her acceptance of what I do it would not be fair nor just. What I can do is find partners that understand this and go from their. Yes I had the ideal situation as far as understanding but did not come close to my lifestyle needs at the time.

So I will explore what my needs are , what I want to experience and go from there. These will of course be what I feel I need and would like. As I cannot be a 24/7 to any one I can look to find a close enough experience for me that would be having much longer sessions. Slave mode for a few days can be arranged at a time especially going into summer. Finding some one for two or three days will hard might well provide in intensity what others gain in time. Now for what I want to feel well I think that should be written on dungeon times.